Another 1 Date Loser

Put on your thinking caps, it’s time to see if you display any of the following behaviors. If you do, you might want to make some attitude adjustments — especially if you never get the second date. If you’re reading this and immediately catch an attitude… hey, we didn’t tell you to make an a@$ of yourselves during the first date!

Forgetting The Lady
In an effort to plan the perfect first date, you forget to make sure she’s having a good time. Ask her if she’s enjoying herself, and if she’s not, don’t hesitate to switch to Plan B. You do have a Plan B, don’t you?

You’re Cheap
Spring for the first round. Let her pick up the one after that (and feign protest), but get that first one. If you don’t, you risk looking like a miser. Show her that you’re willing to invest in the relationship (hopefully, she’ll invest in the relationship by paying for the second round).

Control Your Drinking
Even if you know you can hold ten times your date’s weight in alcohol, control yourself and match her one for one. You can bet that she’s keeping count on how much gulping you’ve been doing.

Don’t Touch Her
I can’t stress this one enough: You can never go wrong by not making any moves on the first date. On the other hand, an ill-timed grab for anything but a door will make you look sexually eager.

Don’t Compliment Her Body
It will make her aware that you’re checking her out. Even if you mean well, you’ll come off as a drooling womanizer. Instead say something like, “You look great.” But skip on both the winking and giving her the two thumbs up.

Whine & Complain
Telling your date all the horrible things you did to your ex-girlfriend after you broke up is like signing a death wish. It won’t make you look good, you won’t score any points, and you’ll only make her nervous to be around you.

Poor Manners
Anything that should take place in the bathroom should stay in that room. Your date doesn’t want to hear or smell it. If you have an itch and need to readjust certain parts of your anatomy, excuse yourself and head for the men’s room. You shouldn’t be grabbing onto yourself like a security blanket.

Too Eager To Impress
Some guys are just so eager to impress that they’ll literally do anything for their date. Unfortunately, women see this as a sign of both weakness and desperation: a major turnoff in the game of love.

Plan For A Wedding
While some men are too busy planning to bed their dates, other men begin talking about marriage and children. Can you hear the bells ringing? And I’m not referring to church bells.

First dates are meant for people to get to know one another enough to decide whether they want a second one. If you start with the wedding plans, I’ll guarantee that you’ll get the famous, “Listen you’re a nice guy, but I need my space” response. Keep the conversation light-hearted.

Here’s how you can win her over…

the winning moves
Okay, now you know all the moves to avoid, but what about the right ones that will make her want a second and third date? Well, they’re not too hard to figure out:

Mysterious
This one’s simple: stay mysterious and don’t divulge too much information about yourself. The less you tell her, the more she’ll want to know. If you want to impress the ladies, keep your ears open and your mouth shut, after all, mystery is the greatest aphrodisiac.

Interview Test
When she begins to ask you all the questions, turn the tables and give her the date interview test. Ask her questions about life, education, work, and career goals. Let her know — through your questions — that a simple pretty face will not suffice to keep you interested; you want a woman with depth.

Be A Challenge
Don’t give her everything she wants. Don’t agree with everything she has to say. Women respect men who maintain their own opinion and don’t let women walk all over them. Remain respectful with yourself, and women will find you more valuable and interesting.

Patience Is A Virtue
Don’t be too aggressive or pushy; you might come across as being a potential desperate stalker. By displaying patience, you’ll be sure not to scare women away.

Lighten up
A date is a date; it’s not do-or-die time. Be in the right state of mind by reminding yourself to have a good time. After all, you’re a confident, fun and interesting person.

Display Of Affection
Just because you’re on a date, doesn’t mean that you’re married or dating seriously. Don’t try to hold her hand, put your arm around her shoulder or tongue her to death. You can’t go wrong with a simple kiss on the cheek.

Unless of course, you feel that you had a really successful date — and I’m not talking about your Willy, I’m talking about signs your date is “kiss” ready, such as her facing you, arms down, head tilted upwards, she doesn’t seem to be ending the date, her lips are parted, and she’s looking right into your eyes. Then you could kiss her genius.

Interesting Topics
Avoid taboo topics on the first date such as sex, your ex, politics, and religion. Instead, focus on the weather, locations (where you are right now), mutual friends, news events, popular culture (movies, plays, music, concerts), careers, schools, and so on.

the follow up

In order to avoid looking too desperate, most men wait seven to ten days before calling back. I personally recommend that you call within two to three days to tell her you had a nice time and to make plans for another date.

There you have it, first dates can be as easy as a walk in the park. Use your imagination, common sense, and treat your date in a similar fashion as you’d like to be treated, and I’m sure your date will be back for a second serving.

Profile: Ave 1 Staff

Avenue 1 offers its viewers an exclusive look at the New York City’s most exclusive trends and unique columnists. Avenue 1 is one of the last remaining online/digital magazines that publishes original content not cut and pasted from other websites.

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